Do you have a kid with mental health condition?
This year could not have gotten worse for my family members and me. For starters, the pandemic took place and forced all of us to hide in our houses for months. Then, I lost my job when the company could no longer pay its employees, while my husband’s job only had him working for three out of six days a week. But the mother of our worries rooted back from when a psychiatrist said that my three-year-old child, Jaren, had low-functioning autism.
According to the children’s mental health diagnostic and statistical manual, most parents would often claim that their children were special, but I was among those few individuals who did not want to admit that my child had been extra special from the beginning.
Our Family Journey
The warning signs of low-functioning autism spectrum disorder began to manifest in my son from the early child’s age of three. Since my husband and I both had full-time jobs, I left Jaren at the daycare center on our ground floor. It was a seemingly easy setup, to be honest. I would drop my child off at the daycare around 8 A.M., visit him during my lunchtime, and pick him up at 4 P.M. after work.
However, after a month of following that routine, the kind teacher at the center pulled me to the side one day, saying she wanted to talk to me about Jaren. I thought she would tell me that our child is a prodigy at something, but her careful words took me off guard.
The teacher said, “Mrs. Jefferson, you have a sweet and gentle child. He doesn’t make a mess like other children and merely does as he’s told. Unfortunately, I need to suggest bringing Jaren to a psychologist for children because he hasn’t been speaking at all.”
Like a mama bird, I initially wanted to curse the teacher and tell her to mind her own business. After all, no parents would be fond of hearing that there was possibly something wrong with their beloved child. That’s especially true for me since Jaren was our only child, and he was perfect in my eyes. But I closed my eyes and counted up to ten and thought that his teacher was merely concerned about his welfare.
After scheduling an appointment with a health care child psychologist and doing a few tests on Jaren, we found out that he was autistic.
Protecting My Son From The World
My husband and I couldn’t help but cry after the child’s mental health professional or child’s health care provider revealed the sad news. Although there was no question about the endless support we would give to our child, we knew that Jaren’s life wouldn’t always be easy. The older our child became, the more he would come across narrow-minded people who might not understand the children’s mental health condition.
The first thing I suggested was to homeschool Jaren for the rest of our child’s daily life. I assumed that that was the best way to protect our child from the world and the haters that live in it, as well as secure his mental health. Despite that, my husband argued that we could shield our child from anything by letting him live like a normal child. Granted, Jaren would have to take special education classes, but my child could be around other people often, which would help improve his social and communication skills despite his mental health condition.
I eventually agreed to my husband’s idea. More than anyone else, I wished for my child not to be defined by his mental health condition (mood swings or mood disorders, eating disorders, depression, anxiety disorders, developmental disorders, post traumatic stress disorder). Our child could still try to achieve any dream he might have, and his dad and I would forever have his back. Nonetheless, I had to add a few rules that my husband thankfully agreed with in dealing with the mental illness of our child.
Not Letting The Boy Play Alone Outside
The ultimate rule was to keep Jaren from playing outside on his own, even if it was just in our fenced backyard. The paranoia might come from the countless kidnapping movies I watched, but there was no harm in reducing the risk of that ever happening.
Saying No To Sleepovers Without Either Of Us
Many parents in my child’s daycare center or school had been introducing sleepovers to their children, but I was not 100% into it. The only time that Jaren could try that was if it took place in our home, and my husband or I were present. This way, we could ensure that our son was cared for very well.
Enrolling The Child To Self-Defense Classes
Again, it’s perhaps my paranoid brain talking, but I encouraged my spouse to let our son take self-defense classes. While it was a challenge for him to follow instructions quickly for his mental health condition, I figured that taking him there every week for as long as possible would do him some good.
Final Thoughts
Finding out that your only son had mental low-functioning autism with attention deficit was the most significant blow to our family. No one expected this diagnosis of a child with a mental health condition, so we were unable to prepare ourselves for it mentally and emotionally. Still, we will always love Jaren, so we will try our best to protect his health from mental health conditions and everything that might endanger his life.